9/16/2005

People Who Piss Me Off By Speaking

Filed under: — Kate @ 1:38 pm EST

People who want me to tell them the “heighth” of an object.

People who pronounce the “l” in “salmon.”

People who are not my mother, father, grandmother, aunt or uncle, a close family friend, or over the age of 65, but find it acceptable to call me “honey” or “sweetie.”

People who ask me if I would like an “expresso.”

People who want to “axsk” me a question.

People who say “yous.” As in “How are yous guys doing?” or “What did yous do last night?”

And the most dreaded of them all: People who say “nuke-u-lar.”

*shudder*

Go ahead and call me a snob. I don’t care. I admit that I’m not immune to this problem. After all, you can’t help but catch a disease if you are in constant contact with infected people. But as far as I know, my only glaring offense is occasionally pronouncing “water” as “wudder.” At least I’m not creating an additional syllable. And I do admit to saying “down the shore.” Damn Philadelphia dialect.

Of course, non-native born English speakers are exempt from my wrath, as would only be fair since I haven’t included my butchery of other languages.

8/16/2005

People Who Piss me off in Elevators

Filed under: — Kate @ 8:00 am EST

People who push both the up and the down button because they somehow think it will make the elevator come faster.

People who push the buttons multiple times because they somehow think it will make the elevator come faster.

People who are not elderly or physically handicapped who get into an elevator to go up one stinking floor.

People who are not elderly or physically handicapped who complain about how long the elevator is taking when they only need to go up one stinking floor.

People who are not elderly or physically handicapped who complain about how long the elevator is taking when they only need to go up one stinking floor, and then refuse to take the stairs when I point out that they are a mere 10 feet away.

6/28/2005

Pick Up Lines That Piss Me Off

Filed under: — Kate @ 1:52 pm EST

Every girl hears a stupid pick up line from time to time. Whenever a guy hits on me, I try to be nice. We all know what rejection feels like, and it sucks. But sometimes I hear a line that’s so asinine, it’s all I can do to keep from saying one of two things:

“Did your mother teach you to talk to women like that?”
-OR-
“What makes you think that you have a chance in hell with me?”

Many times, it starts with a hair comment. My hair color is unusual, and I frequently receive compliments on it from both men and women. And that’s fine. I am ALWAYS gracious to those people. After all, it’s simply a nice thing to say, like “Great purse!” or “I love your shoes!” I just smile and say “Thank you very much.” Unless they ask me if the color is real. Then I might also roll my eyes and say, “It’s quite real.” One of these days, I’ll get up the nerve to retort to the women “Yes, and how about yours?” or to the guys “Wouldn’t you like to know?” Anyway, nine times out of ten, that’s the end of it. But the other ten percent of the time… (more…)

6/8/2005

People Who Piss Me Off By Being Stupid About Technology

Filed under: — Kate @ 5:37 pm EST

People who still have AOL accounts, especially if it’s AOL for Broadband.

People who have their monitor resolution set at 800 x 600.

People who have icons (usually upwards of 40+) scattered all over their desktop with no apparent rhyme or reason.

People who have chronically malware/spyware infected computers.

People who have chronically malware/spyware infected computers and never do anything about it.

People who, after I tell them never to save anything in MS Access, think that they should never save any file in any program. EVER.

People who find it “strange” or “freaky” that someone from the IT department can access our computers remotely.

People who find it “strange” or “freaky” that someone from the IT department can access our computers remotely, and then say “does that go through the network or something?” when I tell them that I can similarly use my laptop to remotely access my home computer. [I actually told this person “No, it uses moonbeams.”]

People who work for an IT department and know less about computers than me (since I don’t work in an IT department).

6/2/2005

Things That People Who Piss Me Off

Filed under: — Kate @ 11:54 am EST

People who use the spacebar instead of the tab key to align things in word documents.

PEOPLE WHO TYPE IN ALL CAPS. Worse yet, people who hit the caps loCK BY MISTAKE BUT KEEP ON TYPING.

People who use a one-way speaker phone system, and expect me to hear them talk when I’m already speaking.

People who travel half way around the world and forget to bring the name and location of their hotel.